The Inner Circle of Control: Where Real Change Begins
The Weight We Carry
How often do we find ourselves holding on to things beyond our control? A conversation that didn’t go as planned, a reaction we wish we could change, a future outcome we desperately want to secure. It’s human nature to crave certainty, to feel a sense of power over the world around us. But when we grip too tightly to what we cannot change, we invite anxiety, frustration, and exhaustion into our lives.
This week, a recurring theme emerged in my therapy discussions—the struggle of holding on to what we cannot control. It’s a battle between our inner world and the outer world, between what we can shape and what we must surrender to.
The Inner Circle vs. The Outer Circle
Picture two circles:
🔵 The Inner Circle – This is what we can control. Our thoughts, our reactions, our choices, our boundaries, our effort, our self-care, and our mindset. This is the space where we have true power, where we can create change, and where we can cultivate peace.
⚪ The Outer Circle – This holds everything we cannot control. Other people’s opinions, their actions, the past, the future, unexpected events, societal pressures, and so much more. The more we focus here, the more powerless and drained we feel.
The Shift: From Resistance to Release
When we shift our energy to our inner circle, we liberate ourselves from the weight of uncontrollable outcomes. We learn to trust the process, to embrace uncertainty with grace, and to focus on what truly matters—our response.
By releasing the need to control everything, we allow life to flow. We create space for growth, opportunity, and even joy. We begin to see that we do have far more power than we realize—not in controlling the world, but in shaping our experience of it.
Focusing on our inner circle allows us to be fully present, to anchor ourselves in the now rather than getting lost in the past or anxious about the future. It is in this presence that true healing begins. As we nurture our thoughts, emotions, and responses, we tend to the inner wounds that keep us stuck. By doing so, we cultivate self-trust, resilience, and clarity. And with this deepened self-awareness, we can finally release the outcome—knowing that we have done our part, and that peace is found not in control, but in surrender.
Daily Practice for Letting Go
The next time you feel overwhelmed, ask yourself:
✨ Is this in my control?
✨ If not, how can I release my attachment to it?
✨ If yes, what action can I take today?
By returning to this practice, we reduce anxiety and reclaim our energy for the things that truly matter—our peace, our happiness, and our power to create the life we desire.
What’s one thing you’re holding onto that you cannot control? And what’s one thing within your power that you can focus on instead?
🌿✨ Manifest Your Best Life: Aligning Mind, Body & Spirit ✨🌿
Have you ever felt like your thoughts shape your reality? The groundbreaking book The Secret by Rhonda Byrne introduced millions to the Law of Attraction—the idea that what we focus on expands, that our thoughts and emotions are powerful tools in shaping our experiences. But what if we could take it even further? What if we could integrate mindfulness, somatic therapy, and breathwork into this practice, allowing us to not only think positively but to feel, embody, and attract our highest potential?
When we combine the principles of The Secret with somatic and mindfulness-based therapies, we bridge the gap between thought and embodiment. It’s not just about thinking positive; it’s about feeling the reality of our desires in every cell of our being.
The Missing Piece: Aligning the Body with the Mind
Traditional Law of Attraction teachings focus on the power of thought—visualization, affirmations, and belief. But for many of us, old trauma, self-doubt, and stress live not just in our minds, but in our bodies. This is where somatic therapy comes in.
Somatic therapy teaches us that our nervous system holds onto past experiences, often keeping us stuck in patterns of fear, anxiety, and doubt. No matter how many times we say “I am abundant,” if our bodies are still operating in survival mode, we might struggle to fully believe and receive that abundance.
By incorporating body awareness, breathwork, and mindful movement, we bring the Law of Attraction into our physical experience—allowing us to deeply embody the energy of our desires.
Mindfulness: The Gateway to Receiving
One of the most powerful teachings of The Secret is the idea of gratitude and present-moment awareness. Mindfulness teaches us to become fully present in the now, shifting our focus away from scarcity and into appreciation.
When we are mindful, we cultivate an inner stillness, creating space to truly listen to our intuition and open ourselves to receiving. Instead of obsessing over “when” something will manifest, we shift into trust and alignment, knowing that what we desire is already on its way.
A Breathwork Technique to Amplify Your Manifestations
Breathwork is one of the most powerful tools for shifting energy, rewiring the nervous system, and embodying abundance. This guided breathwork exercise will help you clear resistance and align your body with the frequency of your desires.
Guided Breathwork for Manifestation & Abundance
Find a quiet space where you can sit or lie down comfortably. Close your eyes and take a moment to center yourself.
Begin with deep belly breaths—inhale through the nose for four counts, hold for four, and exhale slowly through the mouth for six counts. Do this three times.
Visualize your desire as if it is already happening. See it, feel it, and immerse yourself in the experience.
Now, shift to a powerful breath pattern:
Inhale deeply through the nose, filling your belly and chest.
Exhale quickly and forcefully through the mouth.
Repeat this continuous breath (also known as active breathwork) for about 1-2 minutes.
On the last breath, inhale and hold for a moment. Feel the energy of your manifestation settling into your body. Then exhale fully, releasing any resistance.
Rest in stillness. Allow yourself to feel the shift—calm, open, and aligned with your highest self.
This practice helps clear emotional blocks, increase energetic alignment, and amplify your manifestation power.
Bringing It All Together: Thought, Feeling, and Embodiment
Manifestation isn’t just about positive thinking—it’s about becoming the version of yourself that already has what you desire. When we align our thoughts (The Secret), emotions (mindfulness), and physical state (somatic therapy and breathwork), we unlock true transformation.
If you’ve struggled with manifesting in the past, consider incorporating body-based practices into your routine. Let go of tension, regulate your nervous system, and step into the frequency of abundance. Your dream life isn’t just a thought away—it’s a breath away.
Are you ready to align your mind, body, and spirit with your deepest desires? Try this breathwork technique and let the magic unfold. ✨
The Future of Therapy: Setting Boundaries, Mental Health, and Radical Healing
It all begins with an idea.
2/2/25
Let’s be real—therapy isn’t just about sitting on a couch, talking about feelings anymore. It’s evolving, expanding, and becoming more inclusive than ever. As we navigate through social unrest, political challenges, and personal struggles, therapy must transform into something that actually meets people where they are.
For BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color) and LGBTQ+ communities, healing is more than just self-care—it’s an act of resistance, revolution, and survival. The future of therapy must go beyond traditional models and embrace liberation, holistic healing, and community support.
So, how can we set boundaries, prioritize our mental health, and embrace radical healing? Let’s dive in.
Therapy Is Changing—And That’s A Good Thing
For a long time, therapy was centered on Eurocentric, individualistic models that ignored the cultural, generational, and systemic struggles many marginalized communities face. But here’s the truth:
🚀 Healing isn’t just personal—it’s political.
🌍 Mental health isn’t just about coping—it’s about liberation.
🔥 Therapy isn’t just about adjusting to the world—it’s about changing it.
The new wave of therapy is solution-focused, community-driven, and deeply holistic. This means incorporating ancestral practices, collective healing, and breaking generational cycles of trauma—not just diagnosing disorders and prescribing medication (though medication can absolutely be helpful!).
So, what does this new era of therapy look like?
🔹 Culturally affirming therapy that understands racial trauma, homophobia, and transphobia as mental health issues.
🔹 Radical healing spaces where therapy isn’t just about survival but about thriving.
🔹 Decolonized approaches that blend talk therapy with spirituality, storytelling, and embodiment practices like yoga, breathwork, and somatic healing.
Sounds powerful, right? Because it is.
Setting Boundaries as a Form of Self-Preservation
One of the biggest game-changers in therapy right now is teaching people to set boundaries without guilt. Especially in BIPOC and LGBTQ+ communities, we’re often expected to put family, culture, or community before our own well-being. But let’s be clear:
💡 You can love your community and still say NO.
💡 You can care for others without sacrificing yourself.
💡 You can set boundaries and still be a good person.
Here’s how to start:
1️⃣ Release Guilt Around Saying No
If setting boundaries makes you feel guilty, ask yourself: Who benefits from my lack of boundaries? Spoiler: It’s usually not you.
✖️Instead of: “I feel bad saying no to this event.”
✔️Try: “I deserve to rest, and saying no helps me take care of myself.”
2️⃣ Use Clear, Direct Communication
People-pleasing isn’t the flex we once thought it was. Speak up for yourself with confidence.
✖️Instead of: “I don’t know, maybe I can help, but I’m really busy…”
✔️Try: “I can’t commit to that, but I hope it goes well!”
3️⃣ Set Emotional Boundaries with Toxic People
Just because someone is family doesn’t mean they have unlimited access to your energy. Give yourself permission to walk away from toxic conversations.
✖️Instead of: “I have to listen to this because they’re my parent/uncle/cousin.”
✔️Try: “I won’t engage in conversations that invalidate my identity.”
Setting boundaries is liberation work. Protect your peace. You deserve it.
Coping Strategies: Beyond Just “Self-Care”
Self-care is great, but deep healing goes beyond bubble baths and herbal tea. For BIPOC and LGBTQ+ communities, mental health support must be holistic and revolutionary. Here’s how to cope in ways that truly support your well-being:
✨ 1. Embrace Ancestral & Cultural Healing Practices
Western therapy is cool, but don’t forget the wisdom of your ancestors.
🌿 For Black folks – Lean into spiritual traditions, drumming, offerings and communal healing.
🔥 For Indigenous folks – Sweat lodges, land-based healing, and storytelling can be deeply restorative.
🌊 For Latinx folks – Curanderismo, prayer, and ancestral rituals hold powerful medicine.
🌈 For LGBTQ+ folks – Queer kinship, drag as healing, and chosen families create safety.
Your ancestors survived so you could thrive—tap into their wisdom.
🧠 2. Therapy Is Great—But So Is Community Healing
Healing doesn’t always happen in a therapist’s office. Sometimes, it happens in:
✨ A queer support group
✨ A healing circle led by an elder
✨ A dance class that reconnects you to your body
Therapy should be expansive, not exclusive. Find healing spaces that affirm your identity and experiences.
🏃♀️ 3. Move Your Body, Move Your Trauma
Trauma isn’t just in your mind—it’s stored in your body. Practices like:
🌬 Breathwork to release stored tension
💃 Dance therapy to reclaim joy
🧘 Yoga & meditation to reconnect with yourself
Your body has been holding onto so much—let it go.
📵 4. Log Off & Protect Your Mental Space
Social media is draining. Constant exposure to bad news, racism, transphobia, and violence takes a toll. Protect yourself by:
❌ Unfollowing triggering accounts
✅ Creating off-screen healing rituals
💡 Consuming media that uplifts you
You don’t need to stay informed at the cost of your peace.
Revolutionary Therapy: Healing as Liberation
The future of therapy isn’t just about fixing problems—it’s about creating a world where healing is the norm. This means:
🔥 Therapists advocating for social change, not just coping skills.
🔥 Mental health professionals that look like YOU and understand YOUR struggles.
🔥 A world where therapy is accessible, inclusive, and revolutionary.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, just know this: Your healing is powerful. Your peace is necessary. Your joy is revolutionary.
You are worthy of healing. You are worthy of rest. You are worthy of thriving.
And that, my friend, is the future of therapy.
Final Thoughts: You Deserve Radical Healing
If nothing else, remember this:
✔️ Boundaries are love.
✔️ Healing is your birthright.
✔️ Your mental health matters.
Let’s build a future where therapy isn’t just about surviving—it’s about liberation. Ready to heal? Let’s do this together. 💛